There's a J In there… Somewhere!

All my life, I have been told to step out of my comfort zone, try new things, have new experiences.

It’s not something I really understood. I never understood the appeal.

I would push myself to do all sorts of things. So many that others told me were out of my comfort zone, I didn’t find hard at all.

I realised lately it’s because I lived my life out of my comfort zone!

The jobs I did, I was good at the tasks. From the outside, it may have looked like I was in my comfort zone, but it didn’t feel all that comfortable to me.

I would go to the activities that everyone else was doing. Because everyone else was in their comfort zone, I found these activities uncomfortable.

I would push myself to manage the household by following checklists and advice. These were the things that I was told would make life comfortable, however I struggled with them every minute.

Since my diagnosis of autism and ADHD, one of the things I want to do is move to working out what is my comfort zone. To recognise that what other people think is a comfort zone, and what other people tell me is a comfort zone, may be true for them, but isn’t necessarily for me.

One example is public speaking. I have never had any problems getting up in front of people and speaking, from a young age. When I was a child, I remember getting up and doing a reading at my baby brother’s dedication service when I was seven and a half years old. I never had any problem doing oral presentations at school, once I worked out what I was speaking about. It wasn’t until I was older and the voices of others telling me how hard it was that I lost a lot of confidence… however that confidence is returning.

My goal in life now is to work out what my comfort zone actually is and change my life so I’m living IN my comfort zone instead of pushing myself to live my normal life outside my comfort zone.

This doesn’t mean I won’t still try new things and explore life. I love learning and trying things, for the most part. However, it does mean that I will be working to live my life inside my comfort zone… once I work out where that is!