There's a J In there… Somewhere!

Over the last few years, I have seen a lot of memes and comments about ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’. This refers to a decision to delay going to sleep in response to a lack of control during the day so they can do activities they don’t normally do during the day.

Often this is applied to parents of small children, usually mothers, who spend the day running after their kids, then spending the evenings after children have gone to bed doing things like the washing or dishes, instead of having an early night.

I have also spotted this a lot in neurospicy circles.

I don’t like this term as it implies there is a conscious decision to delay sleep, and that if you work harder, then you will be able to go to bed at an earlier stage.

For me, when my kids were tiny, I felt so much pressure to keep the house looking good, care for the kids, run my business, and so much more. I would try to do the dishes during the day, but often didn’t work, so I would do them after the kids were in bed. Then I’d sit for some down time. Days were full on and I needed a break to unwind.

Time blindness would come into play, though I didn’t know it at the time, and before I knew it, it was late and I was still awake. My kids were early risers, and I knew this, but I needed to have a break. Without enough support to get everything done, it was the only time I could have a rest. This late bedtime was not a conscious decision, more something that just happened.

Now that my kids are adults, I find I still have time after dinner where I just sit and unwind. I keep wanting an earlier bedtime, however time blindness comes into play and I sit and relax and find it’s later than I expected!

Streaming TV doesn’t help much. It used to be that I would watch something on TV and it was on at a set time, and I would go to bed when the show ended. With streaming, I will start watching something, and it just keeps going! If I’m not keeping an eye on the time, then it’s so easy for it to get late without me noticing.

Next time you read about revenge bedtime procrastination and think it applies to you, think if it’s a conscious decision that you have made, or something that just happens. If it just happens, and it’s something you want to change, then you may need different strategies than someone who decides to stay up later on purpose.